Lanita Reichman: 3 guys got stranded in an island. A tribe finds them and leads them to their base. The chief says "You must go into the forest and get 10 fruits of the same kinds". So they go, the first guy came with apples. Now the chief said you must stick them up your butt without showing any emotions or we will kill you. So he puts one up, and another, and another. When he got up to the 4th one he flinched and they killed him. The second guy came with cherries and got up to 9. But he cracked up and they killed him. First guy says, in heaven, "Why did you laugh? You were so close". Second guy says "Yeah but i saw the 3rd guy come in with watermelons!"...Show more
Lue Podewils: Here is a joke......women's rights!jk
Rosalyn Olivera: A woman was making breakfast?Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen. "Careful," he said, "CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD! You ' re cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butt! er. Oh my GOD! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They ' re going to STICK! Careful ... CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you ' re cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind? Don ' t forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!" The wife stared at him. "What in the world is wrong with you? You think I don ' t know how to fry a couple of eggs?" The husband calmly replied, "I wanted to show you what it feels like when I ' m driving...Show more
Corrinne Ruozzo: What does a fish say when it runs into a wall? DAMN! :)
Coleman Coscia: q-----why did the cow cross the road?a-------to get to the moooooovies!!!!
Donte Schoenhals: Funny 30 second song - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pi_zyF6rL8c
Jeannetta Gaffigan: Did you hear about the guy who got in a horrible accident and lost the entire left side of his body?He's all right!
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